A Pisces new moon activity to help highly sensitive mothers discover a memory or belief standing between them and their dreams or goals

Mermaids and Dark Waters

There’s something tantalizing about mermaid myths. I especially enjoy stories that describe mermaids singing a spell over fishermen and luring them into deep waters. In these myths the waters are dark and ominous with all kinds of scary creatures lurking in the shadows.  I can’t help but compare these stories to how so many people feel about exploring their emotions or allowing repressed memories to surface.

We tend to fear swimming down into our subconscious minds or our emotional depths. If we let ourselves sink all the way down, what will we find there? What has been hiding under the surface? Something inside us knows there are scary things down there so most of us avoid looking until, of course, something happens and we’re forced to dig deep if we want things to move forward or if we want the circumstances in our lives to change.  Pisces is all about depth, emotions, the unconscious and facing fears. Harnessing the energy of a Pisces new moon enables you to explore the deep dark waters of your subconscious mind before being forced by uncomfortable life circumstances to do so.

This is especially important for highly sensitive mothers to do because, I suspect, they are more susceptible to burying things in their subconscious mind. Highly sensitive people absorb more information from their environment than other people. This information includes things like other people’s emotions, thoughts and energy, the emotions and vibrations of the spaces they spend time in and, in my opinion, if they are really sensitive, they are also absorbing the energy of any Spirits who may be hanging around those people and spaces. Highly sensitive mothers don’t just absorb all that extra information, they have the added challenge of being conditioned to carry the emotional load in their families and communities.

Most mothers are already balancing a roof to keep over everyone’s heads, meals to plan, schedules to keep, calendars to synchronize, activities to drive to, sports to watch, play dates to organize, jobs to earn the money needed to keep everything going and a never-ending list of chores, tasks and errands. On top of this slippery tower of to-dos, most mothers also have the added burden of feeling personally responsible for everyone’s emotional well-being. This isn’t their fault. This is an effect of being raised in the kind of patriarchy experienced in most colonized countries.

For a highly sensitive mother, these patriarchal expectations are like adding a never-ending emotional to do list on top of the heavy load she’s already struggling to carry. And if you are a mother who was raised in an emotionally deficient environment (and let’s be honest, most of us have been) then your inner resources are far too thin to begin with. If you don’t have the resources to handle what you are emotionally or energetically taking on, your system will automatically store what you can’t deal with in your subconscious mind. When you’ve taken on more than you can emotionally process or handle, the information doesn’t just disappear or vanish. It gets stored away.

There’s Only So Much Room in There

To me, the subconscious mind and it’s powers seem limitless but the amount of information it can store is not. If you are not regularly sorting through the information you’ve discarded there and releasing what you no longer need, your body or your mind will suffer. Eventually, there will be more information stored than your system can handle and you will experience an emotional or mental breaking point somewhere along the way…and probably even several of them.

If this has happened to you or is currently happening to you, I hope you understand it is not your fault. You are not weak. You are not a failure. Your system simply was not built for the roles and responsibilities you’ve been taught to take on. No one person’s system should have to carry as many emotional burdens as women and mothers are expected to carry. And no mother with a highly sensitive system should ever expect herself to be able to manage as much as she assumes other people are able to.

Part of managing a highly sensitive system is learning to reduce the amount of emotional burdens we carry and also to clear from our subconscious minds the emotional information we store there.  Since the memories we store there aren’t all pleasant, the idea of diving into those deep waters isn’t exactly exciting but dive we must!

Personally, I love to swim in emotional depths. It’s where I feel at home. I used to tell my son there are many brave people in the world who can face adventures I would be far too afraid to attempt but when it comes to spirit and emotions, I am one hell of a brave warrior. You may want to access some of that same courage when completing the following activity.

A Pisces New Moon Activity

A great way to use the energy of a new moon in Pisces is to call upon Spirit to help you see what you stored in your subconscious mind that is working against a goal or intention. Start this exploration by writing down a goal or intention you’d like to focus on this moon cycle. Next, connect whatever memories come up when you think about that goal or intention. Write down as many memories as you can. Continue to make a web of memories until you have no more memories that surface when you think of your goal or intention or until you see a pattern or pinpoint a belief or memory you know is in conflict with your goal or intention.

Once you discover a belief, thought or memory that might be blocking you from achieving your goal or manifesting your new moon intention, you may feel inclined to clear that block  If you feel inspired with a way to do that, go ahead and clear the block. If you do not know how to clear the block you discovered, surrender it to Spirit. What if your subconscious mind and Spirit could do most of the heavy lifting? What if they could lead you to the perfect way to clear that block? Can you let go and trust you will either be led to the perfect support to help you clear the block or it will be taken care of for you in the mysterious waters of your subconscious mind? (Although this is not the answer for everyone, I offer this kind of support also. You can learn more about that here.)

If you are magically inclined like I am, place the page with your new moon intention and the memories you allowed to surface on your altar and trust that both will be received by whoever you called upon in the Spirit realm to help you. Keep it there until the full moon or until the next new moon, whichever feels right to you.

If you are visually inclined, you might like the pretty journal pages I created to complete this new moon activity.  To access them, all you have to do is visit my home page and enter your email address. When you do, you will be emailed directions on how to download my hand-drawn Pisces new moon journal pages. You will also be added to my online community where I will continue to send you free journal pages every month to help you harness the magic of the moon to emotionally and spiritually nourish your heart and soul.

If you do complete this art activity publicly or share photos of it or perform the activity with a group, please respect the work of this artist and creator by mentioning the source and/or providing a link back to this original post. Also, if you end up completing this activity, I’d love to see what you created. You can even post the finished piece on Instagram or Facebook with the hashtag #danasartrituals or email me at support@danadaponte.com and share with me how it went for you.

with love,

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Love deserves to be celebrated in all its glorious manifestations.  

My aunt, who came out as a lesbian in her forties, was over this weekend and she shared with me the story of my grandfather’s sister who lived with a woman but whom no one ever openly admitted was a lesbian. My great aunt’s sexuality was whispered about but never openly acknowledged. We talked about how times have changed and how the struggles my great aunt must have faced were most likely far more isolating and dangerous than the circumstances we experience.

It took me until my forties to openly identify as bisexual. I’ve always suspected I was attracted to both men and women (and when I’m totally honest and not scared to death of how people will treat me, I even admit the fact that I actually identify as pansexual) but identifying my sexuality has been strange for me because I’m in a happy monogamous heterosexual marriage. It’s obviously not the same kind of experience as it would have been had I been able to identify myself when I was younger but in the last few years it still feels important to me to communicate who I really am.

When I shared my sexual identity with my parents, my mom asked if I ever felt like I was missing out or if talking about my sexuality meant I had a secret longing to be in a relationship with a woman. I explained to her that for me it doesn’t. I LOVE my husband. I mean Love followed by a great big fat exclamation mark. We’ve shared years of memories, support, laughter and best friend magic. We have an amazing relationship! We really do. I feel so blessed to have him in my life. He is everything to me. I would fall into a deflated heap of grief the moment our relationship was not as close as it is now. I’m very happy and have no desire to be in relationship with anyone else but at the same time, it has felt so very important to locate myself. It feels important to define who I am. Not for anyone else. Just for me.

I spent most of my life lost and confused. I was so disconnected from my own feelings and emotional needs. I was so disconnected from my own opinions, preferences and desires. I remember asking my friends, even well into my thirties, “Do you think of women this way?” or “Do you think of men with makeup this way?” It was as if I was looking for permission. I was asking them if I was queer instead of asking myself and of course I never received an answer because it’s not a question anyone can answer but me.

For most of my life, I was stuck in a reality where I couldn’t express who I really was unless someone else related to what I was thinking or feeling. If they didn’t relate, then I shrugged my inner experience off and dismissed my own thoughts and feelings. It had heartbreaking consequences. I didn’t follow my own path in life. I lost opportunities to experience things I’ll never get back. I wore a mask and became a stranger to myself and existed in relationships and friendships that didn’t really align with my true values or needs.

A few years ago, I began to heal on a profound level. I was learning to care for my own emotional needs and the more I cared for my own needs, the more unhealthy relationships and habits in my life fell away. I endured a tremendous amount of grief. Shedding my old self wasn’t easy. I read once, that a caterpillar, before becoming a butterfly, actually transforms into a gooey liquid substance. That struck me as symbolic of what it feels like to transform and grow sometimes. I lose all semblance of my old reality and become a sticky goey mess inside. It hurts and I cry and feel broken but slowly, over time, my new self emerges and it feels so much closer to who I really am. The breaking down period of my life turned me into a sobbing mess of goo but ultimately, it led to a rebirth and who I see myself as now feels much more aligned with my Spirit. Living in a way that reflects my true Spirit is terrifying but also so damn liberating.

In the same year that I openly shared my true feelings around my sexuality, I also allowed my identity as a witch to be seen. I wore my cloak in public. I used the word witch to describe my spirituality and I even started using the word witch in my professional life.

Revealing my true self still leaves me feeling exposed and vulnerable. I sometimes want to crawl back in a hole and pretend I’m someone I’m not. I worry I’m not strong enough to handle rejection. I worry people will be insensitive and unkind. I worry my husband will leave me if I reveal too much. I worry people will talk behind my back. I worry I’ll embarrass my kid. I worry people will avoid me. I worry I’ll lose friends. I worry I’ll end up ostracized. And deep down, I worry I will be threatened or physically hurt or that everyone will turn against me and I will be attacked and hated for who I am. But I’ve lived the alternative and it’s not easy either. The alternative feels like hiding and being fake. It feels like tension and trying to fit my Spirit into a shape that slowly chokes my inner light.  I did it for years. No one asked me to but I did it and it was so unhealthy.

I have another aunt who was one of my favorite aunts when I was a child. She committed suicide when I was a teenager and I think of her often. There were obviously complicated factors that led to her death but those who knew her well knew part of the factors contributing to her unhappiness was that she was living a life she didn’t want to because she was afraid to disappoint or hurt the people she loved. She couldn’t give herself permission to be her true self. I love her deeply but I don’t want to repeat that story so I find myself here, in my forties using words to identify myself that I was far too afraid to use in my twenties and thirties and allowing myself to be seen in ways that leave me feeling exposed and vulnerable. It may lead to people judging or rejecting me but at least I know I won’t be judging or rejecting myself and that feels more important to me. After all, there is no one I spend more time with than me. It’s been a lot more fun hanging out in my own mind now that I’ve learned to love myself no matter who I discover myself to be.

Valentine’s Day is coming up and I want to celebrate all the kinds of love that exist. In our mainstream culture, love tends to be represented in one way. My internal world of preferences and sexuality may exist outside of heteronormative norms but I’m also very aware that my external reality does not. I am a cisgender woman married to a cisgender man. My Valentine fits into mainstream culture’s idea of love. This is not the case for everyone. I’ll never have to face the fear of wondering whether or not it’s safe to hold my lover’s hand. There are a thousand issues I won’t have to deal with that my aunt will. I will never experience the same challenges as her because she is in a committed relationship with another woman but I want to be here to support her and the brave lovers like her nonetheless.

Our bodies, our nervous systems and our mental health can endure only so much before they become overwhelmed. If you identify as anything other than heterosexual and need a little mental or emotional relief this month for any reason, big or small, and you resonate with my work and my approach, I welcome you to book an introductory Intuitive Therapy session at a reduced rate (50% of my regular fee). Simply visit this link and use the code ‘loveislove‘ upon checkout. We can connect to the Spirit Guides and angels and see how they can support you or I can give you a MAP session and remove any subconscious blocks that may be causing unneeded anxiety or self-sabotaging behaviors that are working against your personal or professional goals. It’s not much but perhaps it’ll relieve more than we both anticipate (working with Spirit tends to do that).

with love,

Join us Friday, November 30th from 7 pm – 10 pm for an evening of magic and holiday shopping as we raise money to support a Moon Sister who was the victim of a racist act.

The Moon Sisters Studio for the Visual and Healing Arts is opening its doors on Friday, November 30th to invite anyone who wishes to cast a candle spell of peace and harmony and enjoy an intuitive card reading, an aromatic kinesiology or reiki session while browsing the beautiful jewelry created by Sade of Hawk Lace Jewelry.

All the money raised will be going to support Sade Auger whose vehicle was scratched in a racist act. The long, deep scratch will cost around $1000 to repair and so our fundraising goal is to raise enough money for Sade so she doesn’t have to pay for the damage herself. This is one small way you can make a stand against the racism Indigenous people in Canada continue to face.

These are some of the ways you can help us reach our fundraising goal:

1. Send an email transfer donation to support@danadaponte.com Any amount is welcome and very much appreciated. Thank you.
2. Buy a ticket to the event.
3. Book an intuitive card reading with Lauren Mackay or aromatic kinesiology or reiki session with Melanie Isles to enjoy at the event.
4. Purchase Sade’s beautiful jewelry at the event.
5. Purchase some of the donated products at the event.

Purchase Ticket Here

As a thank you for supporting our cause, at the event we will provide the opportunity to create a candle you can light during the holiday season to bless your home with peace and harmony.

Please feel free to share this event widely and freely with friends and family. We need as much help as possible to raise the funds we need. Click on the social media icons below to share this post. <3

This event was created with the support of Melanie Isles of Full Bloom Herbals and Lauren Mackay of Secret Garden Creative.

Any proceeds we raise over $1000 will be directed to the Awo Taan Shelter for Women Fleeing Domestic Violence and Abuse

Mark the end of summer and the beginning of winter by seeing what messages Spirit wants to share about the months ahead. Capture the images you receive in a beautiful mandala you can refer back to all year long. Scroll down for a version of this art activity you can print and use.

I love the energy at the beginning of a new cycle. Samhain is what I like to think of as the witch’s New Year. Personally, I like to start contemplating my New Year intentions at Samhain and mull them over slowly in my heart and mind until January, at which time I like to revisit my intentions and consider if there are any intentions I’d like to change or fine tune.

Another helpful practice I do at this time is pull tarot and/or oracle cards for each month in the year ahead to see what Spirit might like me to consider. I’m a visual learner so I like to capture the messages I receive in images, colors and words that I can see so I refer back to them all year long. Last year, I hung my new year mandala in my office. It was filled with a lot of cheerleader messages from Spirit and I often referred back to it when I felt lost or discouraged. It also contained a few cautionary messages showing me things to watch out for or consider. This year though, the most helpful part of having the messages up on my office wall was the way the messages shifted from month to month. Some months were uplifting and celebratory. Some months were darker and more challenging. The images in my mandala reflected that and it reminded me that things shift and are in constant flux so my fear that I will forever stay stuck in a difficult moment is untrue. There is always something different around the corner.

My highly sensitive nervous system also appreciates this practice because being prepared for what might come eases my anxiety.

I’ve outlined the steps to completing your own Samhain mandala below. It’s the kind of activity you can do alone during your Samhain festivities or together with friends.

Directions for completing the Samhain Mandala

1. Print the Samhain Mandala from the link below.
2. Gather your art supplies and tarot and/or oracle cards. You can use more than one deck if you like. I tend to prefer pulling one tarot and one oracle card for each month so I use two decks but you might like mixing a variety of decks together in one pile and pulling from there or you might prefer to keep it simple and use just one deck.
3. Light a candle and call in your spiritual team. Inform them of your desire to receive messages for each month of the year ahead. Request their help to choose the perfect card from each deck for each month.
4. Cleanse each deck using your favorite method of spiritual or energetic cleanse such as Reiki, prayer, herbs, crystals, salt, etc.
5. Pull a card for each month of the year.
6. In a journal, write down the names of cards you pulled for each month and after looking up the description of the card in the accompanying guidebook, write down any words, ideas or phrases that seem relevant and important. Alternatively, you can forego reading about each card you pull and instead write the words and/or impressions the card you pulled inspire within you as you study it.
7. Starting with the November section of your Samhain mandala, take the tarot card and the oracle card and your written summary of the messages you pulled for November and draw whatever would best represent the overall feelings and messages you received for the month of November.
8. Repeat the process for the remaining eleven months on the mandala.
9. End with a prayer of gratitude.

This art activity is also included in the October 2018 issue of Oriana’s Moonside Companion which is a hand-drawn moon journal with art activities that are thoughtfully designed to help healers and creative entrepreneurs live with magic and intention and nurture themselves, their business and their families. You can subscribe or learn more about it here.

Download Mandala Here

If you do complete this art activity publicly or share photos of the art activity or perform the activity with a group, please respect the work of this artist and creator by mentioning the source and/or providing a link back to this original post. Also, if you end up completing this activity, I’d love to see what you created. You can even post the finished piece on Instagram or Facebook with the hashtag #danasartrituals or email me at support@danadaponte.com and share with me how it went for you.

with love,

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